29: The Elephant in The Room

"Hidaya? Are you awake?" A familiar voice called.

I exhaled Audibly, so I slept off in the Main living room like most of the time and Aunty Lailah is here to wake me up and send me back to my room. 

All that was just a Nightmare, a terrible nightmare that I'll have to ask for Allah's protection against the whispers of Shaytan right away.

I tried gently rubbing my eyes to make their veins active right away, but the drip hanging on my left hand tells a different story.

I raised the hand and stare at it in horror. 

"Hidaya dear, everything will be alright" said Aunty Lailah in consolation as she hold the hand I was staring at and gently put it down on my side. 

My heart continues beating at an extreme rate after the brief rest it got, because The last time I was conscious I thought it was going to explode in my chest. After hearing such a scary news from a truthful source that I'm sure will not lie to me, after he told me about my family's lies and was kind enough to come at that time of the night to take me away from them.

But how am I back here? Where's Asif?.

I glanced at the VIP hospital room's clock and the time says 8:06am.

I was calculating the duration of my unconsciousness when the door creaks open and two of the four people I once considered my own flesh and blood entered. 

Mummy came rushing to me while Khaleel was following behind holding a small garment bag.

"Hidaya baby" she leaned over and cupped my cheeks between her palms trying to force a smile on her face as we stared at each other reading the emotions in each other's eyes.

But her tears were faster and they dropped at the side of my pillow before she could move away completely, influencing my tears to follow their lead.

Although I wasn't suppressing them, but the confusion and gravity of the Situation going on has dried my teary glands until my mother's eyes moisten them.

I sobbed audibly hoping someone will tell me that I'm crying for nothing, that it's just baseless rumours circulating to tarnish our family's image and they'll clear it up with a concrete proof, a DNA test result or something.

But they just let me cry to my fill, until when the Dietary aide rolled in a trolley containing my breakfast, followed by a doctor who checked on me and removed the drip, informing them that a nurse will come with my prescription to be taken after a meal, then they left together.

"You should pray first, then have your breakfast" suggested Aunty Lailah wiping away my tears while my mum was also crying in Khaleel's arms.

She helped me up and into the bathroom, then arranged everything I would need to freshen up so I could regain some strength before she went back into the room closing the door behind her.

I just slid down and sat on the cold tiled floor wondering what the future will unfold, but it's certain that as long as this is true, my whole world is shattered into tiny bits.

.....

"You promised not to cry mummy, you said you'll be strong for Daya, and now you've also made her cry" Khaleel tried wiping Noor's tears with a napkin but they won't just stop flowing.

She grabbed his arm in deep Anguish "A day like this is my greatest fear Khaleel, it's the only thing that keeps me up at night."

So it's indeed true? He thought.

He hugged her again rubbing her back "It doesn't matter whether you've given birth to any of us or not, you'll forever be our Mother, and we'll continue loving you the same. I'm sure Hidaya also thinks the same, she's just a bit emotional right now" he manages to stabilize her with these words and they waited and waited for Hidaya to come out of the bathroom but there was no sign of her.

Like she was suddenly reminded of something, mummy Noor suddenly turned to Aunty Lailah looking worried and pointed at the bathroom door "what if... what if..." her body began shaking and she burst into tears again " Lailah check up on her please, Hidaya shouldn't harm herself, I cannot endure seeing her hurt anymore" 

Aunty Lailah was already inside the bathroom before she could finish. So she turned to Khaleel tapping his chest anxiously. "Call your father Khaleel, No, hurry and call the doctor please. Wait, there's an emergency button by the bed, it will be faster"

She started going at the direction she saw a bright red button on the bed's headboard, but Khaleel held her back. "Calm down mum,  Hidaya will never do that, I know her better than I know myself, and that's not the kind of home training we've received from you. Self harm is prohibited we were taught that she'll not go anywhere near it, relax please we don't want you to also get hospitalized"

She started exhaling audibly in an attempt to calm herself. "I hope so. I hope so. May Allah make it so"

....

Upon entering Aunty Lailah spotted me sitting in a filled Tub with my clothes still on. My hands wrapped around my legs and my head is bent on my knees while I'm lost deep in thoughts.

"Hidaya." She squats in front of the tub and used her right hand to raise my head.

"Aunty Lailah, I'm now getting chased out of the family right? Since the world have found out that I don't belong there"

She grabbed my hands that were under the water level, that's when she found out that the water was cold, although she set the temperature for me earlier. "You're not going anywhere, you'll always belong with us. We knew about this decades ago and it doesn't matter, to us you're and you'll always be an Ali Omar granddaughter"

"If you knew about it then what about the others? My cousins, my friends; Nimrah, jannah and my colleagues? What about Jk Aunty Lailah? What about Asif?"

She sighed and stood up then tried to get me out of the water "I have no explanation to give you Hidaya, but you'll always and forever be my niece"

It was a struggle but she managed to convince me to take a bath and came out to get me the fresh set of clothes Khaleel brought from home since I was getting discharged in a bit, if there's anything else the doctor will then go and check on me at home.

It was a simple cotton long gown with a floral pattern and a mini veil, but they were glad when they saw me coming out wearing it.

"You should eat, then we'll go home right away" said mummy Noor after I'm done praying. Seems like Aunty Lailah has told her about what I said earlier.

I shook my head "I'm not hungry"

She was about to say something when Khaleel interjected.

"Mummy can you please go and process the discharge before Dad arrives so that time will not be wasted? I'll see to it that she ate."

She glanced at me once again and it's obvious that I'm avoiding her gaze, it's breaking me.

"We'll be right back" said Aunty Lailah as she convince mummy out of the room leaving me alone with Khaleel.

"Eat." He says in monotone.

I raised my golden eyes and set them on him.

"Do you also believe that Jk?. Do you believe that we're not related? Then who are my parents? Where are they? Am I an orphan or an unwanted baby that was tossed in a dumpster where your parents found me?"

"Eat Daya" he pretended like he's never heard what I said and opened the thermo containers for me, then put a spoon on the liquid soup that'll be a good starter for a sick somebody.

I was a about to continue weeping but found a filled spoon at my lips making me to part them slightly and he carefully slid the warm liquid inside my mouth.

He made sure I ate what could contain me before he passed me a glass of water. And as I monitor his actions, his concern, his care, I was thinking that all of it is for nothing, since we're both adults now with no relation to each other, we must stay away from each other as our religion instructed. 

"Whatever the case may be, I love you Daya. Regardless of anything you'll always be my Daya and we'll continue loving you the same. I assure you this will not change anything, once my sister always my sister" he says like he's read my mind.

I put the glass to my lips and began sipping the water slowly in avoidance to further conversation with Khaleel, not because I don't want to continue talking to him but because I don't know what to say anymore.

Mummy and Aunty Lailah entered the room just as I handed Khaleel the glass back to put away, followed by Daddy, Uncle Habeeb and Nimrah.

My dad wasn't crying, he was infact smiling at me but this is the first time I've seen him like this. 

He looks terrifying even.

"Let's go home daughter" he said extending his right hand to me.

I didn't even have the courage to hesitate, so I quickly grabbed the hand and he helped me up while Nimrah got down and removed the hospital slipper from my feet then helped me slid a comfortable one she's brought.

I walked with daddy Kaleem down the  hospital hallway, out of the A&E floor and into his personal car without any question asked, because I already know that if I didn't leave yesterday today won't be an option except maybe if I'm chased out miserably.

Only the two of us in the back seat and the driver drove the car back home, with not a single word exchanged and no explanation was given by dad, we just sat in an uncomfortable silence on my side, my hand still in his.

There in the main living room we found Aunty Zahra, Uncle Aneel, Jannah, Safeenah, Abdulmaleek Then Hajiya.

The rest that went to the hospital with me also joined them. Daddy sat me down on the carpeted floor next to his legs his hand on my shoulder, and that helped stop my tears. until everyone settles down and Uncle Habeeb said the opening prayer before Hajiya started speaking as the elder.

"The last 23 years has been an eventful year for the Ali Omar's, it was a year that we went through so many tests that made everyone in this family to weep. And those 23 years ago, a crucial decision was made, a decision to save so many lives even though the ones who have reached their limit couldn't be saved. We lost my khaleel but Hidaya and another Khaleel entered our lives to fill the void your Uncle has left."

She then turned in my direction. You brought light into our lives Hidaya, nobody should tell you otherwise."

"I'll not beat around the bush" Daddy began talking as soon as she's done ignoring mum that's shaking her head subtly at him. "We planned to take this secret to our graves, however a secret was meant to be exposed. We don't know how or where this got out but truly we didn't give birth to you Hidaya."

Mummy Noor closed her eyes in utter despair. 

Kaleem has finally broken the Egg.

"If you didn't give birth to me then who did please? Who are my parents?" I asked terrified of the situation now instead of the person announcing it.

"That's what we don't know. However we'll forever be your parents. Ever!"

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Seemahwrites ✨