Episode Fifty Six: The Cruel Life

"Tun farko na san cewa Alhaji Bukar ne ya hada auren Ummah da mahaifina, amma bamu taba maganar dashi ba saboda ganin kamar Umman bata so". "Sunan mahaifina Alhaji Umar Mustapha Abatcha" nayi saurin cewa "Alhaji Umar Mustapha dai wanda muke jin labarin sa?" Ya gyada kai yace "shifa. Family din Mustapha Abatcha family ne da yayi suna ba'a Maiduguri ba kadai har ma da sauran Nigeriya. Suna da kudi tun asalinsu but kudin Umar Mustapha daban ne dana sauran. Tun yana saurayi ya mallaki kudin da shi kansa mahaifinsa a lokacin bashi da su. Harkar man fetur yakeyi yi, tun yana yin gidajen man fetur a gari gari har ta kai shi ga fara siyan rijiyoyin man fetur din gabaki ɗaya. Bashi da lokacin aure, dan haka ya jima baiyi ba, wannan yasa yan'uwansa, musamman da yake duk yan uba yake dasu dan shi kadai ne a gurin mahaifiyarsa, suka sako shi a gaba, suna son ya mutu suci kudi. A lokacin ne Alhaji Bukar, tsohon amininsa da sukayi secondary school tare yayi masa tayin auren bafulatanar yarinya Zainab. Shi kuma sai ya karba yana ganin tunda ba auren soyayya bane ba ba zata ke demanding time dinsa ba. Bayan anyi auren sai ta gaya masa labarin wanda take so aka raba su and he was sympathetic, yana nuna mata kulawa sosai fiye da yadda yayi niyyar yi kafin auren nasu ita kuma sai ta kwantar da hankalin ta sukayi zamansu lafiya a nan family house dinsu dake Maiduguri. A haka har ta samu ciki. A lokacin ne kuma ya fara business da Canada yana exporting crude oil daga Nigeria zuwa Canada wanda har yanzu shine sana'arsa, a yanzu yana daya daga cikin manyan dealers na crude oil a kasar Canada" "Tunda Zainabu ta samu ciki shikenan kuma sai al'amurra suka chabe mata, gashi lokacin baya zama a kasar ita kuma taji duk duniya babu inda ta tsana irin gidan aurenta, babu wanda bata son gani kamar mijinta, babu kuma abinda take son rabuwa dashi irin cikin jikinta. Ta zama kamar mahaukaciya, sai ta fita da gudu sai ana binta ana kamota ana dawo da ita gida, wani lokacin kuma sai ta zauna tayi ta dukan cikin wai sai ta kashe abinda yake ciki. Alhaji Umar yana zuwa ya ganta a wannan halin yasan asiri ne dan haka ya hada malamai aka zauna addu'a da magungunan karya sihiri akayi tayi mata, in abun ya lafa kwana biyu sai ya dawo. Ta sha wahala sosai. Ranar nan cikin dare suna bacci ta tashi ta fita ko dan kwali babu ta kama doguwar katangar gidan da aka zagaye da waya da kwalabe amma a haka ta haura ta bar gidan cikin jinin ciwuwwukan da taji, Alhaji Umar yana tashi yaga bata nan ya fito yayi ta nema babu wanda ya ganta sai ya dauki mota ya fita hankali a tashe. Cikin ikon Allah sai ya samo ta tana ta tafiya kamar zautacciya ya kamata da kyar ya saka a mota daga nan sai airport. A can ya samu yayi mata adduoin ta dawo hankalinta ya sako ta a jirgi ta taho Kano ya kira Alhaji Bukar ya gaya masa, shi kuma sai ya koma ya nuna cewa bai same ta ba. Akayi ta nema har da cigiya a gidajen radio daga baya aka hakura. Ita kuma ta dawo gurin yaya Ladi ta zauna a kano. Har ta samu lafiya sosai aka tabbatar duk sihirin dake jikinta ya fita. Anan ta haife ni, Alhaji Umar yazo da kansa yayi min huduba da suna Aliyu "saboda ka zama jarumi ya sa na saka maka Aliyu" daga nan sai ya datse igiyar aurensa da Zainabu, ya kuma roki Alhaji Bukar cewa ya nemo wannan wanda take so din yayi kokarin hada su aure, bayan an samo Baffa kuma Alhaji Umar da kansa ya bashi amana ta. "Dan Allah ka rike shi tamkar kai ka haife shi. Ɗa na kowa ne ai, wata kila ma kai zaiyiwa rana bani ba. Ni dai kawai ina son shi da mahaifiyarsa su kasance safe". Through all those years da nake gurin Baffa ashe duk Alhaji Umar yana biye da rayuwata, kuma yace ko da sau daya Baffa bai taba neman wani taimako daga gare shi ba. To bayan rasuwar Umma da Baffa, bayan kun koma gidan Alhaji Babba sai yaya Ladi tazo ta tafi dani gidan Alhaji Bukar, a lokacin yake gaya min cewa ya gaya wa mahaifina zancen rasuwar har ma kuma ya ajiye komai da yake gabansa da niyyar zuwa gaisuwa saboda yaji mutuwar sosai, amma sai shi Alhaji Bukar din ya hana shi ya kuma bashi labarin irin zaman da Umma tayi da yan'uwan mijinta da irin wulakancin da Alhaji Babba yaso yayi wa gawarta, ya gaya masa in yazo ma babu wanda zai yiwa gaisuwa sai ni da Yaya Ladi, ni kuma ina asibiti ban san ma da maganar rasuwar ba, sai ya ga yafi dacewa kawai yayi zamansa yayi musu addu'a daga inda yake duk Allah zai amsa, ya bari sai na samu sauki sai ayi masa magana yazo yadda watakila ganinsa zai rage min radadin mutuwar idan naji. To amma kuma sai na samu labarin mutuwar tun kafin suyi abinda suka tsara din, dan haka sai suka kuma yin shawarar a gaya min in saka rana da kaina sanda duk na ke ganin am emotionally ready in gaya masa zai zo Nigeria sai mu hadu a Maiduguri. I fixed the date, sai muka tafi. But cikin rashin sa'a sai ya zamanto shi din wani abu ya rike shi a can kasar da yake zaune, Canada, dan haka bai samu tahowa da wuri ba. Ban sami kowa a Maiduguri ba sai step grandmother dina da uncles dina. A lokacin ne kuma kika kirani da maganar za'a hada aurenki da Saghir. Nan take naso in yi musu dan karamin hauka a gidan na dage akan lallai sai an taho anzo Kano an nema min auren ki. Duk kallona suka ringa yi kamar tababbe, irin suna ganin ban isa aure ba ai. Aka kira Papa aka gaya masa yace a rabu dani, wanne irin aure kuma? Sai na karbi wayar na gaya masa ko dai ya ajiye koma me yakeyi yazo ya nema min aurenki ko kuma in kama gabana kuma ba zai sake saka ni a idonsa ba ba kuma zai sake jin labari na ba har abada. Sai na gaya masa ko wacece ke da dangantakar mu, da kuma abinda ake shirin yi miki. Wannan ne ya ja hankalinsa. Sai ya bani hakuri akan cewa ba zai iya zuwa ba sai dai mu taho tare da Alhaji Babagana, daya daga cikin uncles dina. Muka taho din kuwa and you know what happened a gidan Alhaji Babba. Sanda muka fita I was beyond broken. Sai nace bazan koma Maiduguri ba, a gidan Alhaji Bukar zan zauna. Na zauna gidan Alhaji Bukar trying to find a solution amma na rasa ko daya, babu irin tunanin da banyi ba ciki kuwa har da in shirya mana visa tare zuwa Canada sai in dauke ki mu tafi can mu cigaba da rayuwar mu. But sai na tuno da kalaman Baffa da yake cewa ba yaso ya bani aurenki in dai babu amincewar Inna a ciki, nasan kuma yadda Inna bata sona in na dauke ki zata hada daga ni har ke ne ta tsine mana kuma ba zamu taba ganin dai dai ba a rayuwa. And I didn't want to put you through that. Sai na fara bincike ta karkashin kasa, Alhaji Babagana ya bani kudi sosai kafin ya koma Maiduguri dan haka bani da matsalar kudi, I followed Alhaji Babba, I watched him a lokacin da ya siyar da garejin Baffa, I also watched him lokacin da ya siyar da filina, I watched him lokacin daya siya wa dansa gida na bishi har gidan na gani. But bayan ya tafi sai na tsaya ina studying gidan, naga bai yi min ba kwata kwata. Unguwar was deserted dan haka babu security kenan, ko menene zai samu mutum a gidan babu wanda zai sani. Na haura na shiga har cikin gidan sai naga locks din kofofin ba masu kyau bane sosai sai naje na siyo wasu na dawo na cire wadancan na saka sababbin da kaina a cikin kowanne daki tunda ban san a wanne za'a saka ki ba. But still ban gamsu ba dan nasan wannan mijin naki ba lallai yake zama a gida ba, ke kadai zai ke bari so I hired a gate man for you. Malam Iliyasu" na kalle shi da sauri nace "Malam Iliya dai mai gadin gidan Saghir?" Yace "yes. Tsohon soja ne yana gadi anan kusa da gidan Alhaji Bukar to sai wanda yake yi wa gadin ya rasu. So I took him zuwa unguwar na nuna masa gidan, mukayi sa'a Saghir din yazo sai na nuna masa shi nace yaje ya nuna masa cewa gurin zama yake nema, yana son zaiyi masa gadi free of charge abinda yake so kawai a bashi dakin mai gadi ya zauna a ciki. And he took the bait. Nace yace masa free ne dan na fahimci babu yaren da Saghir yake ganewa sosai irin na kudi. So, Malam Iliyasu yayi muku gadi for eight years, ni nake biyansa duk wata, in return shi kuma yana supplying dina with information musamman abinda ya shafi lafiyar ki". Nayi shiru ina tunani and it made sense to me, ban taba jin Saghir yayi maganar albashin mai gadi ba and I thought mai gadin yana da hakuri ne dan na san halin Saghir tabbas ba zai yiwu ace yana biyan sa akan kari ba. Sai kawai naji hawaye yazo ido na, wato wannan shine irin son da Sadauki yake yi min. Ya cigaba da magana "Ban bar kano ba sai da nayi attending daurin auren ku da Saghir. Daga nan airport na wuce straight na tafi Maiduguri ina zuwa kuma na tarar takarduna sun gama haduwa zuwa Canada dan haka kwana na daya a Maiduguri na tafi Ottawa, capital din Canada inda anan ne mahaifina yake zaune da iyalinsa" "I had been holding on, ina ta gayawa kaina cewa ba gaskiya bane ba, cewa ban rasa ki da gaske ba, but sai a jirgin nayi loosing din sauran hope dina. Gani na yi na rabu dake kenan har abada and I couldn't picture my life without you, gani nayi babu wani sauran meaning a rayuwata. Daga airport maimakon gida sai asibiti aka wuce dani, ji nake yi kamar tsaga kirjina akeyi da wuka ana yankar zuciyata sala sala. Mahaifin da naci burin gani sai a asibiti na ganshi and the first thing da ya fada min shine "are y ou this weak? Do you really want to die saboda mace?" Nace "she is not just any woman. She is mine and they took her from me" yace "to me zakayi akai? Zaka kwanta ka mutu ne while tana can tana sabuwar rayuwa da wani ko kuma zaka tashi ka rayu and show them that abinda sukayi is wrong?" And I decided, maybe gwara in rayu din, maybe one day I will be able to see you again, and get you justice from whoever wrong you." "But it was easier said than done. A watannin farko na aurenki I spent more time in hospital than at home. In ina gidan ma kuma ina daki a rufe. Bana kula kowa bana yi wa kowa magana. All I kept thinking about was you, you and you. Kullum tunani na a wanne hali kike ciki? Kinyi missing dina ko kuma kinyi accepting auren ki kin cigaba da rayuwarki da mijinki, duk sanda na bar kwakwalwa ta tayi wannan tunanin idan banyi sa'a ba sai na kwana a asibiti. Na kira Malam Iliyasu sai yake gaya min cewa Saghir yayi tafiya sai ke kadai a gidan tare da wata mata. A haka the agonizing months sukayi ta wucewa, the most terrible times of my life, tun Papa yana min fadan halin da yake ganin na saka kaina a ciki har ya koma tausaya min". "Ranar nan ina gida da rana kawai sai ga wayar Malam Iliyasu, nayi mamaki dan nasan cewa dare ne ku a wajenku na dauka sai naji cikin tashin hankali ya na gaya min wai baki da lafiya, shi yana ganin ma kamar kin mutu dan yaga maigidan ya dauko ki cikin jini ya saka ki a mota ya fita dake. Papa yana office busy kamar kullum dan haka message kawai na tura masa na dauki kudi da passport na tafi airport. Ban samu jirgi zuwa Nigeria ba sai Ghana, daga nan na samu zuwa Abuja. Sai dana shiga Abuja sannan na samu wani zuwa Kano, ina shiga Kano na kira Malam Iliyasu yace min shi bashi da wani labari tunda kuka fita shiru, sai na wuce gidan Alhaji Babba, na shiga har compound din gidan saboda yadda nake jin raina I was beyond caring akan me zai faru in aka ganni. Amma sai na tarar da gidan a hargitse, hankali na ya tashi and I asked wani mai kula da flowers sai yace min ai gobara ce Alhaji yayi duk shagunan sana'arsa sun kone kurmus babu abinda ya tsira dashi. Sai na tambayeshi game da matar Saghir, sai yace haihuwa ce kika yi amma yaran sun mutu, ke kuma an kaiki asibiti amma baisan wanne asibitin ba" Yayi shiru yana jujjuya hannunsa kamar mai haddace kamannin hannun, sai kuma ya dago yana kallona yace "wannan labarin yana daga cikin munanan labaran da suka taba shiga cikin kunnuwa na a rayuwata. A duk cikin kwanaki, satittika da watannin da suka gabaci wannan labarin kullum in ina kwance a d akina ko a gadon asibiti ina tausar zuciyata ne ta hanyar gaya mata cewa auren ki ba mai dorewa bane ba tunda ba kya son Saghir, ina gaya mata cewa ni kike so, ina gaya mata ba zaki karbi Saghir ba amma sai gashi watanni bakwai da daurin auren ku kin haifa masa ƴaƴa, it broke my heart, it really broke me, amma a lokacin sai na danne zuciyata da take kokarin kaini ƙasa na dora batun rashin lafiyar ki a sama, saboda lafiyar ki da farin cikin ki sun fi min komai, sai na cigaba da tambaya game da yadda zan san lafiyar ki" "Muna cikin magana Inna ta shigo gidan, ta wuce mu ba tare da ta ganni ba kuma na lura hankalin ta a tashe yake, ta shiga cikin gidan ta sake fitowa sai na tura wanda muke tare nace yaje ya tambaye ta ya mai jiki? Anan naji sunan asibitin da kike, ana bukatar jini kuma ita ta rasa kowa duk gidan suna gurin Alhaji da yake asibiti shima. Sai na fice ba tare data ganni ba, na je asibitin da kike na nemo dakin da kike na shiga har ciki na ganki. You were sleeping, kamar allurar bacci aka yi miki. Kin kumbura sosai kinyi fari tas. I stayed a dakin for a while ina ganin kamar in na fita bazan dawo in tarar dake da rai ba but I knew dole inyi wani abu sai na tafi nace Inna ce ta turo ni in biya kudin asibiti, sunyi min maganar jini da ake buƙata amma kuma basu da blood group dinki available sai an nema kafin a siya, sai nace su gwada nawa in yayi su ɗauka kuma sai aka yi sa'a yayi dai dai, suka ce suna bukatar leda uku first amma sai suka dauki biyu kawai dan sunce nima ba jinin ne dani sosai ba, sai na biya kuɗin asibitin na kuma bada wanda zai isa a nemi wani jinin a kara miki, da kuma na sauran abinda zai iya tasowa daga baya. Akwai wadda a gurin ta tambayeni ko nine mijinki and it pained me to say no. Na katse shi "wait, wai kai ka bani jini ranar nan a asibiti? Kai ka biya min kuɗin asibiti a lokacin da nake kokarin rasa raina bani da mataima ki?" Yayi murmushi "naki fadar kaina ne saboda nasan yadda Inna bata sona zata iya cewa ba za'a karba ba dan kar in shafa miki maita or something like that" nima nayi murmushin da ya fito da sabbin hawaye daga ido na, na sani tabbas Inna a lokacin zata iya aikata hakan. Sai kuma na tuna yadda ta ringa jera adduoi ga wanda ya taimaka mana. Ya cigaba "Kullum ina zuwa in duba ki ba tare da na bari wani ya ganni ba saboda ni zuciyata tana ba zata barni in zauna ba tare da nasan halin da kike ciki ba. Na tabbatar kina samun sauki sosai, ranar nan saura kadan Mama ta ganni na buya duk I doubt ko ta ganni ma zata gane ni saboda ni kaina nasan I looked terrible. Ranar nan nazo sai akace min a ranar za'a sallame ki. Sai na tsaya and I saw you sanda kuka fito, ke da Inna da Saghir da wadansu mata. Kuka shiga motar Saghir ke da Inna kuka tafi and I kept following you a kafa sai danja ta tsayar daku har na karaso inda kuke and I did what I shouldn't have done, nayi miki magana" Da sauri nace "I knew it. Nasan kai na gani amma Inna tace wai aljanu ne suka bude min ido". Yayi murmushi. "Ban kyauta ba na sani bai kamata inyi wa matar wani magana ba but I did it." "A ranar na koma Abuja daga nan kuma na koma Canada. Sai da na zauna a jirgi sannan nayi jinyar zuciyata na ciwon da take akan batun haihuwar ki da Saghir. I accepted cewa you have moved on. Kin karbi auren ki kin karbi mijin ki dan haka ya kamata nima in karɓi kaddara ta rashin ki, kaddara ta ta rayuwa da soyayyar matar wani a zuciyata dan nasan cewa zan rayu ne kuma zan mutu da sonki ba tare kuma da na same ki ba, tunda ke din ta wani ce. A ganina wannan yana daga cikin worst fate da mutum zai hadu da shi a duniya, and that was how cruel my life was". "A cikin jirgin nayi making decision cewa it was time to move on, ba wai moving you out of my heart ba but moving on with my life. Dan haka ina zuwa gida na samu Papa nace "am ready to move on yanzu" yace "good. Sai ka tafi makaranta kayi mechanical engineering dinka" sai nace "ina son karatu amma nafi son business, in yaso sai in hada da karatun da business din duka" yace zai saka ni a harkar crude oil, but sai nace masa bana son aiki under him, I want something of my own, yadda zan making name for myself ba wai in jingina dashi ba. Na dauka zai ji babu dadi but sai naga yayi murna, yace wannan ya nuna masa how strong I am. Sai yayi signing check ya bani yace in cike kudin da nake ganin zasu ishe ni in kafa kaina. Na rubuta kuɗin da na riga na kayyade a raina na mika masa sai ya yaga check din yace "wannan kudin da zan bawa wani ne in tazo neman taimako gurina. Ba kudin da zan bawa tilon dana ya kafa business ba. Sai ya sake signing wani ya miko min yace "multiply that by hundred, ka rubuta kaje ka karba. Allah yasa albarka a ciki". "That was the beginning of Abatcha Motors. Sanda na zaɓi Kano a matsayin inda zan kafa head office dina sai da Papa ya tsare ni da ido yace "why Kano?" Sai nace "nan ne Center of commerce, kuma nan nafi sabawa da" amma a raina na san ina son dawowa kusa da ke ne, bana son inyi nisan da in kina neman taimako na zan gaza baki. Cikin few months aka gama komai na fara hiring ma'aikata. A lokacin ne Malam iliyasu yake gaya min cewa kuna cikin matsalar kuɗi dan yaga ana ta fitar da kayan gidan ana siyarwa ana siyo kayan abinci. So, I talked to someone who talked to someone har aka gayawa Alhaji Babba cewa ga sabon company nan ana daukan ma'aikata and luckily shi kuma Saghir ya dauko takardunsa ya fito neman aiki a lokacin sai aka turo min shi". "A gurin interview din dana yi masa ne na tabbatar cewa bai sanni ba. I gave him a job. Amma ba job bane ba dan baya ma cikin list of staff dina. Salary dinsa daban nake bashi and his salary was just like me giving you money. Ina bashi kudin dana san ya isa ya kula dake". "Ina gab da komawa Canada ne sai yazo office dina yana ta complain wai matarsa ce zata haihu kuma doctors sunce ba zata iya haihuwa ba sai dai ayi mata aiki, gashi sunyo masa bill na kudi da yawa. I was scared kar yazo yaki biyan kudin ki zo ki samu matsala irin na wancan haihuwar so I paid the money. Har na kara masa da kudin ragon suna da sauran hidima, ranar da za'ayi aikin na kwana ina miki addu'ar nasara, I wanted to go and see you but nasan hakan ba dai dai bane ba sai na hakura nace ya kirani in anyi ya gaya min yadda kuke, sanda ya gaya min an samu mace I asked him ya sakawa yarinyar Subay'a knowing cewa zaiyi duk abinda nace and hoping hakan zai faranta miki ranki". "Daga nan na koma school. Carleton University of Canada. Anan nayi karatu tsahon shekaru biyar na fita da matsayin mechanical engineer. A wannan shekarun ne muka yi bonding sosai da yan uwana. My four sisters, Sa'adatu, Falmata, Fanna da auta Adama, wadanda Papa ya bani task din koya musu hankali dan zaman kasar turawa ya saka duk sun koma suma kamar turawan, tunda a can aka haife si baki daya a can kuma suka girma. Yanayin shigarsu da yanayin mu'amalar su duk sun zama kamar suma turawan ne. I treated them with fire, but sometimes kuma sai inyi musu sanyi muyi ta wasa da dariya. Maman su kuma ta bani goyon baya sosai gurin koya musu hankali dan dama yanayin nasu duk yana damunta itama turancin ne yasa bata iya tsawatar musu". "All those years, nayi iyakacin kokari na dan ganin na cire ki a zuciya ta amma abin ya faskara. Nayi addu'a, nayi azumi nayi sadaka duk da wannan niyar, daga baya sai na saka a raina cewa wannan shine kaddara ta, zan rayu da sanki a zuciyata amma bazan rayu dake ba. Ban dauka cewa babu abinda ya ragu na sonki a zuciyata ba sai dana dawo, ranar da staff dina sukayi surprising dina da party, I saw you there, I tried pretending but then I saw him holding your hand and I couldn't take it, nasan in ban bar gurin ba zan iya rufe shi da duka dan haka na gudu" "A ranar ne nayi nadama, nayi nadamar bude Abatcha motors a Kano nayi nadamar daukan Saghir aiki, a ranar ne na fahimci cewa ni ba sadaukin gaskiya bane ba, ina da weakness, weakness dina kuma shine ke. Na san cewa babbar matsala ce zama na a kusa da ku saboda feelings din da nake ji a zuciyata akan ki babu abinda ya chanja, na kuma fahimci ina da tsananin kishi a kanki, kishi kuma marar tushe tunda shi wanda nake kishin dashi mijinki ne. That was how cruel my life was" "Kullum in na gan shi a office babu abinda zuciyata bata ayyana min inyi masa, but I always kept a smile on my face and I always said kind words to him, treating him good, treating him better than most of my staff dan ina ganin hakan zai faranta miki rai tunda shi mijin ki ne, tunda a ganina lokacin shi kike so. And he always liked to talk about you a gurina, ina ganin kamar yayi realising hakan yana calling attention dina bai san cewa hakan yana kara min jin zafin sa ne a raina, sannan hakan yana kara min kullum kara jin labari akanki". "Wannan ya saka ranar nan na dawo daga Maiduguri na kira shi nace ya dauko ni a airport, ba wai dan na rasa wanda zai dauko ni bane ba dan ina da drivers din company wadanda zasu iya amsa kirana ko da cikin dare ne, but I knew he will talk about you a cikin motar sui6 yasa na kira shi, hoping to use the opportunity to talk him into letting you go back to school, dan tun kafin nan ya gaya min secondary school kadai kika gama. But he did worst than that, he took me to your home" Yayi shiru kamar mai tunani, wannan yasa na dago kai na kalle shi sai muka hada ido, yace "I am not a saint Diyam, ni mutum ne mai tarin laifuffuka, amma a koda yaushe a cikin duk abinda nake yi ina kokarin ganin cewa ban ketare iyaka ta ubangiji ba, ba zan ce bana tsallake once in a while ba amma in a kokari wajen ganin ban tsallake din ba, sai dai a cikin ajizanci irin na ɗan Adam. Duk da irin son ganin ki da zuciyata take yi amma na sani cewa shiga cikin gidan aurenki tsallake limit din ubangiji ne, nayi iyakacin kokarin ganin cewa ban shiga din ba but he kept insisting, har sai da ya kai gurin da in na cigaba da ja zai iya suspecting wani abu dan haka na shiga din hoping cewa ba zai kira ki ba, but he did that, and ganin ki a cikin gidan ki tare da mijin ki ya saka nayi loosing control din da nayi ta kokarin gathering, ya taɓa min wani bangare na zuciyata da yake cike da tsofaffin ciwuwwukan da suka ƙi warkewa. And I left, amma bai bar ni ba as if trying to rob a salt on my wound sai gashi ya biyo ni da abincin da daga baya na fahimci ke kika dafa shi, na kuma fahimci Sadauki kika dafa wa ba Mr Abatcha ba". "I drove through out the night a daren nan, trying to clear my head, trying to focus, trying not to think, trying to heal my aching heart" "Daga ranar kuma sai na fara ja baya da shi ko da a office din ne, saboda na fahimci bashi da kishin iyalinsa ni kuma ina tsoron kar alakar mu ta bawa shaidan damar kafa tarkon sa a cikin my already bleeding heart, dan shaidan yana iya corrupting even the most pious of hearts" "Wannan tsoron da nake ji, tsoron shaidan da abinda zai iya aikatawa a cikin zuciyata akan ki shi yasa nayi ta treating dinki the way I did, to create distance, saboda ni na sani kamar yadda kuma Allah ya sami matsayin da na baki a zuciya ta ba irin matsayin da na bawa Asma'u bane ba, ko da nayi fooling mutane nayi waya da ke nayi harka dake da sunan ke kamar kanwa ta ce shi ubangiji yasan ba haka bane a zuciyata, kuma judgement dinsa shi nake tsoro ba na mutane ba". "Then one day ina dakina na hotel ana ruwan sama, har na fara shirin bacci sai ga wayar Malam Iliyasu yace min mamanki da kanwarki sunzo gidan Saghir ya kore su, ga dare gashi ana ruwa yana jin tsoron kar wani abu ya faru dasu. I left everything na hau mota na taho unguwar ina tafiya ina dubawa, hankalina a tashe ina tsoron kar in zama too late, sai gasu nan kuwa na gansu already har sun fada hannun mugaye. I couldn't imagine me zai faru da Asma'u idan da Allah bai sa Malam Iliyasu ya kirawo ni ba. That was when I decided to sue Alhaji Babba for garejin Baffa da filina. Tunda rashin mutunci suke ji I decided to show them real rashin mutunci". "Na tura Saghir Germany a lokacin ba wai dan ina son kar ya shiga maganar ba, na tura shine saboda ina son kar ki shiga maganar shi yasa na shirya muku tafiya da ke da shi, amma sai bayan ya tafi sannan na fahimci ba dake ya tafi ba. Tun daga lokacin na fara suspecting something was off a zaman ku" "Wannan shi yayi stating chain of events din da har suka kai ga rufe Saghir" "Na sani cewa I shouldn't have sent you that message, wanda na tambaye ki ya jiki, amma bayan kishin da kika nuna a kaina ranar nan a gaban su Inna, na kasa controlling zuciya ta, I shouldn't have, but I did, kuma nayi regretting a second after message din ya tafi amma kuma daga baya dana fahimci shine silar rabuwar ki da wannan monster din sai na fahimci it is worth it, sam a yanzu bana jin haushin abinda na aikata" "Ina so ki fahimci cewa ban rufe Saghir dan in aure ki ba. Yes, I loved you, I love you and I will take your love with me to my grave but da ace zaman lafiya kuke yi da Saghir da babu abinda bazanyi ba dan ganin cewa zaman ku ya dore a tare. I would have given up everything in dai zakiyi farin ciki. But after na fahimci irin zaman da kuke yi, after what he said a gaba na ba tare dako digon nadama a muryarsa ba, after ke da kanki kin gaya min cewa ba kya son komawa gidansa then I won't let you". "Yes, na barwa Saghir kudina intentionally saboda ina so ya dauka, saboda ina son in samu hujjar rufe shi yayi paying for abinda ya aikata. But I didn't force his hands. Shi yayi making decision din dauka da kansa. And that's what took him to prison bani ba". "Yanzu na dawo gurinki Diyam. Ina neman auren ki bisa yardarki. Yes, nasan shekaru sunja ba lallai ne kina da feelings for me irin na da ba. Amma ina so ki fada min abinda yake ranki, in kika karbi offer ta ta aure I will surely be the happiest man on earth, in kuma kika ki karba I will be heart broken maybe fiye ma da wancan karon but I will respect your wish. Bazan matsa miki ba ba kuma zan bari a matsa miki ba". "Ina jiran amsar ki" [1/12, 20:44] ***: *🎶 Diyam🎶* *2nd Edition* *Maman Maama*