Chapter twenty one

🤍SIRRIN ZUCIYA🤍

By Aysha Rano✨

Wattpad@aysharano22

Arewabooks@aysharano

11

Ayaan bai tashi sanin sun aikata barna ba saida komai ya kammala hankalinshi ya dawo jikinshi snn ya fahimci ba karamin laifi suka aikata ba...innalillahi wainna ilaihi rajiun shikam garin yaya ya biye mata har haka ta faru a tsakaninsu?..garin yaya yayi loosing control dinshi?...tambayoyin da yaketa yima kanshi knn yayinda hawaye keta ambaliya kan fuskarshi sai kace karamin yaro...da kyar ya iya yunkurawa ya sauka daga jikinta dama tana samun kanta wani wahalallen bacci yayi gaba da ita.

Lumshe ido yayi ya bude yana kallon abinda yafi komai daukan hankalinshi a jikinta wato fuskanta dake nan fayau tanata sauke numfashi akai akai kila sbd abinda ya faru a tsakaninsu ne ko kuma sbd maganinda aka bata wanda ba karamin wahalar da ita yayi ba...sunkuyawa yai ya dora fuskarshi ga nata sa'adda yakejin wani special connection da attachment a tattareda ita sai yakeji kmr da ba komai yakeji kanta ba compared to what he's feeling yanzu...kuma dukda haramcin abinda suka aikata yasan it will forever be among the best things da suka taba faruwa dashi and it will forever be in his mind bazai taba mantawa ba...har snn kuma hawaye yakeyi sosai kmr an bude pampo baisan meyasa yakejin kmr Allah bazai taba yafe mashi ba...baisan dalilinda yasa irin wnn qaddara ya shiga tsakaninsu ba amma yasan for sure shi ya fita zunubi tunda ita ba cikin hayyacinta take ba, duk abinda tayi ta aikatashi ne sbd influence na maganin da aka bata ba kamar shi da yake cikin hayyacinshi ba, shi mamakin kanshi ma yake ta yanda ya iya aikata wnn abun yanada shekara 20 kacal a duniya, wlh bai taba zaton he can be this dangerous ba sai yau din nan.

Yasan kila Allah bazai taba yafe mashi ba, haka nan sai Ummanshi ta fado mashi arai ya tuna irin tarbiyyar data bashi bakin iyawarta ga kuma ilmin addini shima ita da Abba sun bashi daidai gwargwado yasan duk sukaji wnn abinda ya aikata bazasu taba yafe mashi ba...tunanin haka kadai yasashi fashewa da kukanda ba sauti don yana ganin yaci amanar mutanen da dukda kasancewarshi ba dansu ba amma basu taba bambamtashi da 'ya'yan da suka haifa ba...da sauri ya sauka daga gadon yana maida wandonshi har snn kuma Juwairiyya batasan me yakeyi ba don bacci sosai take kmr matacciya...kofa aka taba yayi saurin daga ido yana kallon kofar shaf ya mance ashe fa Lee da Nusaiba suna gidan?...ya zare idanu daya tuna kila ma sun shigo sun gansu suna aikata abinda suka aikata ya ilahil alamina ina zaisa kanshi idan haka ya faru shikam?...Lee ne ya shigo dakin tareda Nusaiba da flask din ruwan zafi a hannunta...kallon Ju dake bacci dukkaninsu sukayi snn suka kalli Ayaan da yayi kasa dakai yana goge hawaye yama ki yadda ya dago kan balle ya kallesu...Nusy bata kawo komai a ranta ba ta wuce ciki ta ajiye flask din tana kallon Ju dake kan gado tace"naga ta samu bacci ma"...kai kawai Ayaan ya iya gyada mata ba tareda cewa komai ba, shikuwa Lee haka nan yaji bai yadda da baccin da yaga take ba snn ga Ayaan duk ya gama nuna kanshi yanda yaketa sukuyar dakai sai yayi kala da mara gsky.

Kallon Juwairiyya ya sakeyi jikinta gaba daya rufe da duvet har fuskarta then back to Ayaan da sai sake kauda kai yake don koda ba kallonshi yake ba yanajin yanda eyes dinshi ke yawo a jikinshi, kirjinshi sai sama da kasa yake gabanshi nata faduwa don bazai taba son ace Lee ya fahimci abinda suka aikata ba...mikewa Nusaiba tayi ta fita tace bari taje ta dafa mata ko indomie ne kafin ta tashi sai ya zamana saura su kadai a dakin, Lucas kmr jira yake ta fita ya karaso ciki a hankali idanuwanshi na kan Ayaan kai tsaye yace mashi"me kayi mata Ayaan?"...a firgice ya daga ido yana kallonshi lokaci daya kuma ya sauke idon yanajin yanda kunya ke neman hallakashi ta kuma hanashi mgn...karasawa kusa dashi Lee yayi ya mika hannu ya dago fuskanshi yana kallon tun daga fuskan nashi har zuwa legs dinshi dake trembling sbd tashin hankali, lura yayi da belt dinshi da bai gama daurewa ba suka shigo nan take ya gama concluding cewa lallai wani abu ya shiga tsakaninsu don ba yanda zaai tayi wnn baccin indai ba samun nutsuwa tayi ba to saidai in maganin ne ya saketa wanda kuma yasan bazai taba sakinta yanzu ba don overdose aka bata...ya kuma ga yanda da bakinta ta cema Ayaan din she wants him snn definitely yafi kowa sanin yanda Ayaan ke mutuwar son Juwairiyya don haka ba abin mamaki bane don son ya rinjayeshi ya aikata mata abinda takeso musamman daya kasance shima ba dutse bane.

Gajiya Ayaan yayi da irin kallon tuhuma da Lee ke binshi dashi kawai ya fada jikinshi ya kankameshi, jikinshi har kyarma yake sbd rudani da tashin hankali kmr zaisa kuka yace"na shiga uku na lalace Lucas wlh bansan lokacinda haka ya faru ba...bansan lokacinda nayi loosing control ba i tried everything possible to stop myself amma na kasa, am just being human i couldn't stop myself"...hugging nashi back Lee yayi yana patting bayanshi wnn karon shi kanshi saida yaji kwalla ta taru mishi a idanuwanshi don tausayinshi, cikin lallami yake ce mishi"its ok Ayaan it's not your fault"...girgiza kai Ayaan yake yana cewa"no its my fault, da ban biyema son zuciyata ba da hakan bai faruba, nasan yanzu kila bazata soni ba"...rufe mishi baki Lee yayi bayan sunyi breaking hug din yana share mishi tears yace"it's not entirely your fault, ai ba kai kadai ka aikata ba it was consensual"...yace"kaga itafa ba cikin hayyacinta take ba"...Lee yace"dukda haka it was consensual tunda itama tanaso don haka ba raping dinta kayi ba"...shidai har snn bai gamsu da wnn bayanan na Lucas ba dukda kusan gsky ya fada, na farko da amincewarta hakan ya faru tunda itama ta bashi hadin kai, na biyu kuma she asked for it kawai dai dan ba cikin hayyacinta take bane amma ko Allah yasan ba raping dinta yayi ba...haka dai Lee yayita lallabashi yana jaddada mishi cewan ya kwantar da hankalinshi duk inda zaaje shi zai iya bada shaidan cewa ba raping dinta yayi ba kawai yaje ya nemi gafarar ubangiji tunda koshi da yake Christian yasan sex without marriage is strongly haram in islam.

Juwairiyya kuwa bacci sosai taketa yi kmr gawa don har suka tafi bata farka ba lokacin wajen karfe daya na dare.

Suna zuwa gida Ayaan ya shiga bandaki yayi wanka da alwala snn yazo yayita gabatar da nafilah yana rokon Allah ya yafe masa wnn zunubin daya dauka na aikata zina da kananun shekarunshi, yana kuka yake rokon gafarar Allah yana hadawa da istigfhar don yayi nadama sosai...bai kwanta bacci ba sai bayan yayi sallahr asuba shima ba wani me yawa yayi ba ya tashi da zazzabi sosai a jikinshi amma hakan bai hanashi zuwa gidanta ba don yayita kiran wayarta baya shiga tun asubah...Lee ne ya rakashi sukaje tunda ba lfy ne dashi ba and to their biggest suprise Nusaiba kadai suka samu a gidan wai Juwairiyya ta hada kaya ta tafi inda ko Nusaiban bata sani ba amma tace idan yazo ace mishi kada ma yayi wahalar nemanta don bazai ganta ba sai kuma wata zungureriyar wasiqa data bayar a bashi...wnn mgn ya kusa sa zuciyar Ayaan yayi bindiga wanda nan take zazzabinda yake jikinshi ya karu ninki ba ninka...meyasa Juwairiyya zatayi mishi haka?...me yayi zafi zata yanke mishi wnn danyen hukuncin?...shin abinda ya faru tsakaninsu laifinshi ne shi kadai da zatayi taking wnn decision kmr raping dinta yayi?...wai meyasa so bai taba mishi uziri ba?...meyasa so baida adalci?...meyasa duk wayan nan abubuwan suke faruwa dashi at just 20 years meyasa so bazai daga masa kafa har saiya girma ya mallaki hankalin kanshi ba?...wnn karon ko digon hawaye bai zubo daga idonshi ba as ya gaji da kukan har hawayen sun kare sai zafi kawai da yakeji cikin zuciyarshi...kafafuwanshi kasa daukanshi sukayi wasiqar ma sai Lee ne ya amsa snn ya kamashi suka tafi gida shi kanshi yana iya jiyo hucin da jikinshi ke fitarwa ta cikin rigarshi tsabar zafinda jikin ya dauka.

To cut long story short sati guda Ayaan yayi a kwance ba lfy saida yasha drips da allurori snn ya samu ya dan farfado amma fa ya zuba uwar rama idan ka ganshi kmr wanda ke fama da hiv, to dama can ba qiban ne dashi ba balle kuma yanzu da soyayya ya sashi a gaba ya qarar dashi tass kmr kudin kuzuri...har zuwa wnn lokacin kuma baiji daga juwairiyya ba kuma bai hakura da nemanta ba sbd duk abubuwan nan dake faruwa ko digo daya baiji sonta ya ragu a cikin zuciyarshi ba saima  karuwa da yakeyi kullum yana cika mashi zuciyar har wani lokaci yanajin kmr bazai rayu ba.

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Rano✨