8. ... Me yasa ni...🖊️

Daga ƙarshe dai Asma'u ta fito fili ta faɗa Ni,mummuna ce..haɗiye abinda ya tsayamin a maƙoshi nake ƙoƙarin yi amma na kasa '' wai kin ko kalli madubi duk yau? Ni sai naga kamar pimples ɗin...'' kafin ta kai ƙarshe da gudu na na isa ɗaki na tsaya gaban madubi 

hawaye masu yawa kamar ambaliya suka fara bin fuskata ashe ƙaiƙayin dana ke ji bahaka kawai bane..ƙurajen sun wani fito ɓula ɓula a gaba ɗaya fuskata babu inda babu su... musamman goshina sunyi daɓa daɓa

faɗuwa nayi wurin na fashe da kuka '' meyasa? meyasa hakan ke faruwa dani..!! ada akwai inda babu su amma yanxu akwai su ko ina bazan taɓa magance su ba!" sosai nake kuka kamar raina zaifita 

shigowa Asma'u tayi tana kallo da murmushi tace '' nikam Alhamdulillah..sai Godiya!" takoma waje ta zauna cikin nishaɗi..

fara karanto min list zuciya ta tayi '' da farko kinyi addu'a ba'a karɓa ba,bakida shape bakida kyau ,baki zama me Godiya ba,bakida sef istim,an kore ki daga aiki ,cikin ki ƙatoto bakida gashi..dadai sauransu kuma fa kinyi addu'a! inaa sallar daren da kikayi? ina addu'oin da kikayi? ina sadaƙar da kika bada...amma har yanzu babu abinda ya canja sai ƙara lalacewa da abubuwa suke tuwo anya ma addu'ar kina karɓuwa? anya ma zaki samu Abinda kikayi addu'a akai kuwa? zaifi dacewa ma idan kin dena addu'ar da sallar daren duka dan ba amfani!" Wannan tunanin ya ƙara haifar min da wani ƙunci a zuciyata 

meyasa? meyasa duk wannan gaskiya ne..meyasa ko abu guda danayi addu'a da fatan samu ban samu ba? Tun ina jss nake ta addu'a akan kusan komai danake kuka akanshi yanzu amma babu abinda ya canja meyasa? Ga mutane da yawa ko rabin abinda nake basayi amma suna samun biyan buƙatar su...ji nayi daga yanxu bazan sake addu'ar ba idan har BAZAN samu Abinda nake so ba

'' bazan sake yin addu'ar ba,ƙaramin ƙunci ha...''

'' kul Abeedah!" Mama ta katseni daga bakin ƙofa,ɗago jajayen idanuna nayi ina kallon ta taƙara so ciki ta zauna kusa dani '' ashe bakida hankali baki da wayo ban sani ba? shi Allah'n kike cewa bazaki sake yiwa addu'a ba? toh ai kanki kika yi mawa! shi Allah baya da buƙatar Addu'ar ki shashasha kawai!" nan Mama ta canja min ta dinga yi min faɗa ta inda take shiga bata nan take fita ba

'' akan wani banzan kyau da wani banzan abinda kike sha'awa zaki kafirce ma abinda Allah Yayi miki? ya baki lafiya,ya baki gida ci da sha kina raye kina da uwa da ƙanwa amma akan wani ɗan ƙanƙanen abinda ƙila ma ba alkhair bane gareki kike nan kina faman kushe abinda yayi maki? wai Abeeda bakisan a yanda kike ɗin nan kinfi wasu ba? waya faɗa maki cewa pimples da rashin diri shike nuna asalin ƙimarki...'' shiru nayi ina kallon Mama ina ajiyar zuciya 

ina ma ace Mama zata fahimce Ni? abun... babu wanda yasan yanda ake ji sai wanda ke fuskantar hakan yanda nake ji na muzanta yanda mutane ke ƙara sani ina tsanar kaina yanda maganganun su ke tasiri akai na,,,inama ace inada sef istim...

jawoni Mama tayi tana goge min fuska ta '' Mama...nima bada son raina nake haka ba,amma babu yanda zanyi zuciya ta baƙin ciki take a koda yaushe,koda nayi ƙoƙarin kada in kalli abinda banida shi,koda nayi ƙoƙarin inyi farin ciki da wanda nake dashi kasawa nake Mama, Babban dalili kuma shine nayi addu'ar,nayi sadaƙar,nayi roƙon amma...'' ƙara rushewa nayi da kuka zuciya ta na ƙaramin raɗaɗi rungume ni tayi tana shafa kaina '' babu abinda ya canja Mama, abubuwa sai ƙara lalacewa suke... Mama ji nake kamar duk sanda na fara addu'a akan wani abu da nake so,me makon ya ƙara kusanto ni sai nisa yake ƙarayi...bana so ina munana zato ga Allah,bana so in zama marar godiya gareshi amma...na kasa jurewa! zuciya ta akoda yaushe tana tunamin da cewa nayi addu'a amma har yanzu babu abinda ya canja sai ma ƙara ƙuntata da nake yi....'' na ƙarashe maganar ina kuka sosai... Babban abinda na fahimta game da kaina shine koda abubuwan da mutane suke yabawa bana buƙatarshi kuma bana sonshi,matsawar mutane sun yabe shi,ji nake kamar nima in sameshi koma menene shi bayan ni har ƙasan raina abun nan bashida wani amfani a gareni! bansan meyasa rayuwa ta ta ta'allaƙa da abinda mutane suke tunani ba

ina so in zama duk wani abun da mutane suka yaba koda babu amfanin da hakan zai min gaba ɗaya jina nake kamar bani ba...kamar wata ce daban a jikina wacce maganganun mutane ke juyata son ransu,ni kuma ina daga gefe ina kallo kamar prisoner duk yanda naso infita daga wannan prison ɗin in zama ni...na kasa! 

'' Na fahimci abinda kike ji Abeedah!" ɗago kaina nayi ina kallon Mama itama ni take kallo ta fahimce Ni? bata ji aranta kamar niɗin me tsananin raki ce kawai ba? bata ji aranta kamar ni ina kokawa akan abunda bai kai ya kawo ba? bata ji aranta kamar abinda nake kuka akanshin situpit ne? Dan nida kaina ji nake idan da za'a tambaye ni takamammen abinda nake ma kukan shiru zanyi ..na farko saboda ban tabbatar ba idan abinda nake ma kukan ina sonshi da gaske,ina buƙatar shi... a ganina kawai ina da son mallakar abune koda bazai amfane niba.. mema ake cema kalmar da turanci? uhm.... yawwa 

🍁🍁: Obsession!

yawwa inada obsession akan abinda nake burin samu musamman idan nayi addu'a akai toh aganina dole in samu wannan abun 

na biyu kuma saboda inaga abun baikai yakawo ba amma shine nake nan ina wahalar da kaina...abun har kunya yake bani amma ya zanyi? zuciya ta tana son abinda take so lokuta da yawa nayi ƙoƙarin in sadaƙar in dena kokawa amma na kasa... 

'' na fahimci abinda kike ji Abeedah,ashekaru irin naki,yara masu tasowa kamar ki suna fama da irin wannan matsalolin wasu suna iya magana wasu basu iya magana,na san yanda kike ji Abeedah akwai wahala ganin kowa na cigaba yana samun abinda yake so kai kuma kana nan a'inda kake bakayi gaba ba sai ma baya! amma ki saurareni Abeedah, baki yi latti ba kina a inda ya dace ki kasance! Sannan addu'oin ki da kike gani kamar basu karɓuwa, Allah yaji kukan ki,ya karɓi addu'oin ki yana shirya maki wani gagarumin abune a bayan fage fiye da yanda kike tsammani kuma kika roƙa! kowa da kike gani a duniyar nan da tashi ƙaddara da jarabawa,ke wannan itace taki jarabawar dan haka kiyi ƙoƙari ki cinye kinji?" gyaɗa kaina nayi wani irin natsuwa na sauko min,ina matuƙar godiya ga Allah daya bani Mama da wata uwace da tuni ta kore yaranta ko tana faɗa musu cewa sun cika raki ko abin ba wani abu bane ko me suka sani game da hakan da suke wani damun mutane... Amma Mama? Ita ta daban ce,ta fahimce mu idan munzo da damuwar mu bata kore Mu tana saurarar mu sannan ta bamu shawara!

amma Ni nakasa yarda da cewa abinda nake fuskanta jarabawa ce,a tunani na kafin a kira abu da jarabawa sai yakai matuƙa wurin wahala,kamar ace mutum baida gida,baida abinci,baida inda zaije ga rashin lafiya...da dai sauran bala'oa irin wannan, nikuma ɗan ƙaramin abune nake fuskanta..da gaske jarabawa ce hakan?...

washegari asabar bayan sallar asuba muka zauna mu duka harda Mama mukayi muraji'ar hizb goma daga cikin ƙurani mai girma,duk cikin mu,Mama itace haddar ta take tass babu wani kuskuren harafi ko madda ba kamar nida Asma'u ba, har gara ma ni...

da gari ya waye muka karya da kunu kamar kullum sannan muka kwaso kayan muna datti duka muka fara wanki bamu gama ba sai washe gari da yamma 

zaune muke mama na shafa min ruwan shinkafa akai Asma'u tana duba littafin ta na math '' Mama nima ina ga zan shiga spelling bee ɗin nan,ina so in sama mana sabon gida..!" nayi maganar ina wasa da gashin jiki na daya kwanta luf 

'' ke Abeedah rufa mana asiri,ba makarantar mu kaɗai bace ba fa! kin tabbata zaki iya hawa stage gaban camerori da wannan fuskar taki da pimples suka dabaibaye? ko kada kije wurin riƙe gaban hijabi kisa mu faɗi..'' Asma'u ta faɗa tare da ɗaukar buta ta shige baye

na kasa fahimtar dalilin da yasa Asma'u take min haka..

'' Manta da Asma'u, Allah ya bada Sa'a amma nidai nafison gidan nan tuwo..'' ture tunanin Asma'u nayi daga raina sannan nace '' nima Mama amma muna buƙatar yalwataccen gida..'' batace komai ba 

Bayan ta gama madubi na ɗauka ina kallon fuska ta musamman girata da take nan kamar an aske da lashes ɗina da suke ƙara guntancewa, tuna wannan abun da Abeed ya bani nayi da sauri na miƙe na shiga ɗaki ina neman abun amma ban ganiba 

'' me kike nema?" Mama ta tambaya daga inda take '' wani ƙaramin kwalba me takarda green anyi wani rubutu da Larabci da turanci!" na bata amsar da damuwa ganin ban gani ba 

'' ki tambayi Asma'u naganta da wani ƙaramin kwalba bansan ko shine ba '' Asma'u na fitowa daga bayen na tambaye ta sai cewa tayi ta jefar... hawaye suka taru a idona '' ko kinyi amfani dashi babu abinda zai canja.. you're hideous!" ɗauke Asma'u da mari nayi kafin insani,Mama ta kalle mu a nutse amma bata ce komai ba 

ɗago kanta Asma'u tayi da mamaki tana kallona,jiki na narawa na nuna ta, hawaye maƙale da idona murya ƙasa nace '' meyasa kike min haka Asma'u? na yarda kin fini komai ni ban kaiki ba ata ko wane fanni meyasa kike ƙoƙarin ƙaramin damuwa akan wanda nake cike?" idanunta sunyi jawur ƙirjinta na sama da ƙasa cikin muryar dani kaɗai zanji abinda ta faɗa tace '' saboda ke mummuna ce ina matukar jin kunyar a gan mu tare!" 

bangaje ni tayi ta wuce ɗaki,bayanta nabi da kallo hawaye na zuba babu wani shamaki 

ɗauke fuskar ta Mama tayi... hijabi na najawo na fice daga gidan, ahankali nake tafiya ba tareda nasan inda zani ba, mutanen unguwar mu musamman yan makarantar sai magana suke min amma ban tanka kowa ba... zagayawa nayi na tafi gulbin dake bayan gidan mu nayi tsaye wurin hannu na rungume da ƙirjina ina kallon ruwan da suke kore shar...

Ga wani dutse dayake kwance malale bishiyar kaiwa ta fito saman dutsen sannan wurin kwari ne inda ake fasa duwatsu... da yawan lokuta almajirai harda yaran unguwar mu suna zuwa wurin dan suyi wanka kuma fa ruwan datti ne dasu, mutum zai iya samun wasu ƙuraje ana kiransu da ƙazuwa... har kashi ake ciki ana zubar da shara amma hakan bai hana su 

iska sai kaɗa ruwan yake...suna baya a wani irin salo me sanyaya zuciya... amma ni? zuciya ta da yanayin da nake ci,bai bani damar godewa wannan yanayi ba... ina nan tsaye har hadari ya ɗan taru sannan daga can gefe shara ake ƙonewa wani farin hayaƙi ya game wurin rana ta faɗi,tunda natsaya wurin babu abinda nake sai hawaye kukan ma yaƙi zuwa

Asma'u ta karya min zuciya fiye da yanda yaron nan yamin lokacin da na rubuta masa letter... shikenan duk abinda Mama ta faɗa min ɗazu yabi iska don dai na dawo yar gidan jiya

'' meyasa nake mummuna? me yasa nima ban kasance kamar yanda nake addu'a akai ba? me yasa ban kasance kamar irin matan novels ɗin da nake karantawa ba? Akwai wanda zai taɓa sona a yanda nake...?" kuka me ƙarfe ya sarƙeni, zuciya ta na tsananin ƙuntata rufe fuska ta nayi da tafin hannuna ina risgar kuka 

hayaƙin dake wurin sai ƙaruwa yake amma ina ruwa na tunda ba Asthma nake da ita ba? ji nayi fuska ta tafara ƙaiƙayi sosa wa nake idona sunyi wani mahaukacin ja,dena kukan zahiri nayi saidai na zuci... da ƙyar na samu ƙaiƙayin ya tsaya 

kallon ruwan gulbin da ruwan suka ɗan dena motsi sai kuma na kalli ranar data kusa shigewa,gobe na tabbatar da sabon baƙin ciki zan tashi babu kokonto a wannan 

sake cikowa da hawaye idona sukayi hayaƙin nan ya ƙara zama me kauri harma ba'a ganin wanda ke ɗayan ɓangeren dan kamar hayaƙin ya zama labule ne daya raba wurin..mayarda kallona nayi akan ruwan gulbin jin ana kiraye kirayen salla 

'' Kitten!" lallausar muryar shi ta sauka a kunne na..juyowa nayi naga mutum na fitowa ta cikin hayaƙin nan hannayen shi cikin aljihu da murmushi a fuskar shi kamar kullum,idon mu ya haɗu,jinayi zuciya ta na bugu da sauri kunya ta rufe ni kamar ƙasa ta haɗiye ni 

da sauri nayi ƙasa da kaina, hawaye na zuba ina wasa da hannayena a ƙarƙashin hijabi na anya kuwa bazan fara saka bra ba duk da har cikin raina na tsani wannan abun

ƙarasowa yayi ya tsaya daga gefe na ƙamshin shi na cika hancina duk daya biyo ta cikin hayaƙin amma beyi ƙauri ba

Murmushin dake fuskar shi ya ɓace ganin yanda idona sukayi jawur, yamutse fuska yayi kafin cike da damuwa yace '' Are You okay?" jina yi tambayar taban haushi na ɗago da jajayen idona a ɗan tsiwace nace '' nayi maka kama da wacce ke lafiya?" ƙiftawa yayi sau dayawa sai kuma a sanyaye yace ''yi haƙuri.. faɗa min Meya faru?" share idona nayi batareda na kalleshi ba nace '' babu komai... kawai ina...babu komai!" na faɗa a dake gyaɗa kanshi yayi yana kallona da idon nan nashi dake sani ina rasa natsuwa ta... ban san yanda zan fasalta ba amma wani irin kallo yake bina dashi wanda nake ji har cikin ƙasusuwana... turo baki nayi inaja baya nace '' wai kai baka gajiya da kallo? bafa nasan kallo!''

yar ƙaramar dariya yayi yace '' ni kam ina son kallon ki ABEEDAH...'' ya kira sunana da wani irin salo da yasa na kalleshi da idona da sukayi ja ƙwayar idona ya ƙara zama dark ash colored...murnushin shi ya ƙara faɗi har ina ganin haƙoran shi..samun kaina nayi dajin kunya na juya da sauri nabar wurin 

'' Bamu gama magana ba kitten!" ya faɗa yana ɗaga murya banma jishi ba nikam...

Shafa fuskarshi yayi..

'' My little kitten..🐈" ya furta kafin ya juya yabar wurin yana tafiya a nutse....

***

RU'UYAA…📖

₦500 ne idan ya kammala zai koma 800

Biya ta wannan account ɗin 9138091955..Salma Aliyu opay

Shaidar biya ta ***

Autumn writes 📖🖋️