Prologue

Tana zaune a parlour na kawo mata ruwan sha kafin abinci yayi Zaid ya shigo ciki. Ban tashi daga inda nake ba na ɗago kaina na kalle shi nace “Welcome home, Zaid” 

Nodding kai yayi sau ɗaya suka fara magana da Yaya Hauwa. Ban tashi domin wucewa ba. Nayi zaune ina sauraren duk abinda suke faɗa duk da ba wani ji sosai nake ba. Idan da dama zan iya cewa su buɗe murya domin naji duk abinda suke faɗa. 

Cikin wasa naji tace mishi, ƙasa-ƙasa “You renovated your house? It looks beautiful. Are you bringing in another wife?”

Allah kaɗai yasan abinda nake yi domin naji abinda Zaid ze ce, naji kuwa yace “It looks beautiful right?”

   “Yes, it does”

    “I just decided to renovate the house. The colour is fantastic”

Nodding kai Yaya Hauwa tayi da murmushi akan fuskar ta ta kalle ni tace “Lafiyar ku dai ko?”

   “Alhamdulillah” na faɗi mata

   “Nayi ta dubawa ko zaki zo amsar turare baki zo ba” tace tare da kallon ledar dake wurin ƙafar ta ta ɗauko ta ba Zaid domin ya bani. Miƙo min ledar yayi na amsa nayi godiya amma kuma kamar Yaya Hauwa jira take na faɗa mata dalilin rashin zuwa na amsar turare. Tunani nake ko na faɗa musu su biyu na ji suna shawarar sakin da Zaid ze min. 

   “I came” na fara cewa se ta ɗan ɗaga girar ta Zaid ko kallona baya yi kuma ba waya yake dannawa ba, maybe it's irritating and disgusting for him to even look at me. “I think I overheard you and Zaid talking so I went back”

   “Really?” Yaya Hauwa ta faɗa tare da crossing ƙafafuwan ta “I think that was the time he was considering divorcing you” ta faɗa min tana kallona. Nayi mamakin abinda tace amma nuna min take ba maganar ba'a so naji ne akayi ba, cikin su babu me tsoro na.

Shiru nayi bana kallon ɗaya daga cikinsu se naji Zaid ya tashi ze fita. Yaya Hauwa tace “Ka zauna mana”

Tsaye yayi ya kai aƙalla seconds ashirin se ya koma ya zauna. 

   “Kina saurare Hadiza” Yaya Hauwa ta fara magana “Ni fa ba tsanar ki nayi ba. Halayen ki dai ne a wurin Zaid bana so saboda duk yadda zan so ki a rayuwa, kin san se nafi son Zaid. Kuma ni ba zan taɓa cewa Zaid ya sake ki ba har se kin sake aikata irin laifin da kika mishi domin ba zan zauna ki maida shi shashasha ba because he's not one. Ko ke ake yiwa ɗan uwanki abinda kike yiwa Zaid, you'll be very alert and angry. Haka kuma duk abinda ya faru bana so nayi sanadiyyar sakin wata mace da za'a yi se idan cutarwar ta ga mijinta yayi yawa ta yanda ba'a tsammani. He told me he loves you and I know how your parting will affect him because of the love he has for you but I told him the obvious: if you continue with your attitudes, he'll have to divorce you. He told me you have changed which is good. But I just can't wrap my head around what you did. Why will you do what you don't want to be done unto you to your fellow human? Will it not hurt you?”

Shiru tayi tana kallona nace “Na gyara duka halaye na, duka halaye na amma Zaid har yanzu baya kallona. Nayi haƙuri sosai akan walaƙancin shi amma har yanzu be sauko ba. Mutum haka ze zauna baya yafiya kuma ya riƙe abu a cikin ranshi?”

Kallon Zaid Yaya Hauwa tayi da bayi da niyyar faɗin wani abu. 

   “Zaid ana rayuwa haka? To menene amfanin gyara halaye idan wanda akayi domin shi ba ze yafe ba?”

Shiru yayi be ce komai ba. Nan haushi ya fara kama ni saboda nafi so yayi magana akan wannan shirun da yayi. 

   “I want us to live as a loving couple. I have changed and this change is the most truest thing about me but he's failing to see everything as he should”

    “Zaid we're talking” Yaya Hauwa ta faɗa tana kallon shi

    “I don't know what's happening but I'd love to let everything go. It's just that my heart is having a hard time doing it” Zaid yace 

Saukar da idanuna nayi ina ƙara jin haushi yana rufe ni. 

Shiru Yaya Hauwa tayi saboda tasan bata san abin faɗa ba.

  “If you really love me as you have been saying, you'd have let everything go the day I said I'm sorry” nace cikin muryar da duk me saurare ze san raina a ɓace yake. Shiru Zaid yayi be ce komai ba daga gani ma shi Yayar shi kawai yake sauraro banda ni. 

   “You see him at it, Yaya” na fadi tare da tashi tsaye “Sau nawa ina baka haƙuri kuma ina nuna maka duk na chanja dabi'una amma baka kulawa baka damu ba baka ma so nayi. To me kake so nayi? Zaid idan har ka gaji da zama dani ba zaka iya ba ba zaka iya haƙura ba, ka sallame ni na koma Kaduna because I'm tired of living like this da sunan auren ka akaina amma kamar ba me aure ba. Idan ba zaka iya ba zuciyar ka hakuri ta duba chanjin da nayi, ka sallame ni na koma Kaduna dama akan dalilin ka, dalilin aurenka na zo Abuja, zaman ka kai kaɗai nake a cikin garin nan”

Yaya Hauwa ce ta tashi ta riƙe ni “Ya isa mana”

   “Dan Allah ki bar ni na fidda frustration ɗina yau” nace tare da share hawaye na ina jin haushin hawayen da nake “Nasan nayi kuskure amma nace a yafe min kuma ina kan gyara halaye na but you're so hell bent kana son ganin outburst ɗina da rashin haƙuri na a kodayaushe. Akan dalilin me? Mutuwa zan yi ne idan ka sake ni? Ka sake ni kaga idan ban cigaba da rayuwa ba Zaid. I'm just so tired my heart is tired. I'm looking for human connection not just human but you. Amma ka rufe idanun ka ban san wace irin zuciya ce da kai ba da bata son ka da alkhairi” hawaye na suka yi ƙarfi nasa hannuwa na ina share wa. 

   “Are you even listening to yourself Hadiza? Duk irin abubuwan da kika aikata a cikin gidannan kina tunanin zaki samu pass da ƴan waɗannan abubuwan da kike yi? Who knows you're genuine? ke kanki baki san koda gaske kin chanja ba har kina tunanin zan yarda dake” Zaid ya faɗa tare da tashi tsaye. 

   “Zaid bana son irin wannan abun kana ji ko? Zauna”

Ƙin zama Zaid yayi, he's so hurt a idanun shi mutum yana iya ganewa. Cigaba da magana yayi “Duk wani abu uncalled for, you have done it in this house and to me and you expect me to just forgive and forget? Idan da mantuwa da wuri ake yi meyasa da kika shigo gidannan a matsayin matar aure ba ki wanke zuciyar ki ba kin shigo da zuciya ɗaya ba but you're a betrayer Hadiza and that's the only thing you are good at”

    “Will you keep quiet Zaid?” Yaya Hauwa tace tare da yi wurin shi ranta duk ya ɓaci 

   “A betrayer that changes her way is better than someone clean whom do not forgive and hold grudges as if it's the only thing that makes him stay alive” na faɗa mishi sharply ina kallon shi nan take hawayen da suke min yawo a kunci suka tsaya 

   “You see? Are you hearing her Yaya? I know she still takes pride in her betrayal because what's she saying? This woman right here is a chameleon and I hate that she's one”

“If I'm a chameleon, what are you, Zaid? Kana tunanin kai kaɗai ake ɓatawa rai ne? Ko kai kaɗai ake cuta? Nima wannan zaman da muke yi na yanzu tare da kai kana cuta min and I'm just so tired of it”

Yaya Hauwa komawa tayi ta zauna a kujera tana kallon su da ɗaɗɗaya, idan wannan yayi magana wannan ya amsa. 

   “You should brace yourself for what's coming your way before I discard you”

Baki na fara buɗewa jin kalmar discard a wurin Zaid. “You are a villain kai mugu ne wallahi kuma babu matar da zata iya zama tare da kai duk faɗin duniyar nan saboda wannan hali naka”

   “A villain huh? Ai duk wanda yake iya zama da macen da ta zubar mishi da ciki har biyu, bata ma san menene aure ba da duka haƙƙin mijinta da nata, babu wacce ba ze iya zama da ba”

Cikin tsawa nace “Can you just stop talking about that abortion? Naga yarannan da na zubar nima inada haƙƙi akansu, yarana ne nima idan kuma kai kaɗai kayi contributing wurin haihuwar su ka ƙara samun wasu yara ba tare da ni ba”

   “I know! I know you're not remorseful about that abortion”

   “Ka rubuta min takardar saki na na bar maka gidan ka kana ji ko? Just divorce me just let me go”

     “Stupid woman!” Zaid ya faɗi