BABI NA TARA

RANAR ƘARSHE da suka gama Law week nasu, an bata award na the most classy kuma kowa yasan ta chanchanta. An kuma bata certificate of participation na debate da suka yi. Tare dani muka koma apartment nata. A ranar ni kaɗai na dafa mata abinci tana kwance akan gado nace ta huta ganin irin gajiyar da tayi. Ina cikin yin abincin aka kira ta. Tana ɗauka nasan da mahaifin ta take magana. Kallo ɗaya na mata naga yadda suke waya da mahaifin ta kamar wani sa'an ta. Ni mahaifina se nayi wata da watanni ma ban gan shi ba kuma bamu yi waya ba. Nima mahaifin nawa ba he's strict bane ba. I was raised in a home of love where love is never an issue and love between my parents was loud and clear and visible. We don't have much in my house but I believe there's peace. 

Na gama dishing abincin a plate ta gama waya. A cikin plate ɗaya muka ci abincin bayan mun gama ta jani zuwa gadon ta. I didn't know what came over us, the two of us, but everything start getting intense between us. “What is love if there's no lust, Baffa?” I heard Temi says. “Should we do this?” she asks me. ”Yes, we should. We should Temi.”

   “I don't have protection in this room. I have never done this” 

I held her close to my chest and says “I have never done this too, Temi. I think we should go raw. We are both clean”

That's the conversation we did before getting intimate and we did it right on her bed in her apartment. It was embarrassing at first because we were both new but we were successful in it. We did it. And we was happy. 

I laid beside her, breathing calmly while she closes her eyes and held my hand tightly. “Does it hurt?” I asks her

“Yes, a little”

“Does it need medical attention?” I teased her 

Temi let out a laugh and beat my chest lightly “Yes. You should call me a doctor before I get sore down there” I smiled. 

We were both satisfied and that's more than enough for the both of us. 

Being Muslim, tashi nayi na shiga banɗakin ta domin nayi wanka. A ciki nake tunanin abinda addini na yace akan irin wannan abun. Nasan nayi crossing boundary da be kamata nayi crossing ba amma kuma nayi saboda son zuciya. Rufe idanuna nayi nayi muttering astaghfirullah a cikin raina ina tunanin nasihar mahaifiyyata a koda yaushe. Idan zata yi magana irin wannan bata ɓoye-ɓoye. Fitowa take ta faɗa maka abinda ya kamata ka sani. Dalili shine irin environment da muka tashi a ciki. Nan kamar kowa yasan komai game da jikin shi tun yana karami unlike the northern Nigeria. My mom will tell you plainly not to go and sleep with woman and if you do, and the woman becomes pregnant, that's on you and she don't care about it and she'll tell you plainly that God Has told us to not go close to adultery. She'll tell us to learn to control what's between our legs. If a man can control what's between his legs, then he can control everything in this world. And today, I couldn't do it. I know I had thrown sand onto her face, I know if she had known, she'll question the training and the values she instilled in us. She'll say “Where have I gotten this wrong? Is there anything I haven't told you , Baffa?.” But I know she tried and that she tried her very best. And I'm sorry the feelings were so strong I couldn't surpass them. 

Bayan na fito daga banɗaki take tambaya ta abinda nayi a ciki. 

   “I took a bath”

Da mamaki take kallona se kuma tace “Do i have dirt on my body or maybe I smell?”

  “No, not at all. I practice a religion whereby whenever you do this kind of thing with someone, you ought to have a ritual bath”

Fuskar ta ta saukar tace “You guys are so clean. Before you pray, you wash some part of your body, after intimacy, you bath. That's impressive”

   “You find it impressive?”

   “It really is, Baffa” tace tare da tashi tsaye babu kaya a jikin ta. I stared at her body and then I smile and look away. 

Kayanta ta saka ta dawo gefe na ta zauna. 

  “It has been a week already, Baffa. Are we continuing this or we become best of friends or we just drift apart?”

Tip na hanci na na taɓa ina tunanin zaɓen da ta bani akan alaƙar da muka kulla cikin sati ɗaya. Temi, a wurina, bata da wani matsala ko kaɗan. She's a nice girl wacce babu abinda take nuna min se irin ƙaunar da take min. Amma kuma makarantar nan zata bari bada jimawa ba kuma ta faɗa min tana so ta bar Nigeria idan ta gama. Nasan ko yau take son barin ƙasar nan zata bari ba wani abu ne me wuya a wurin ta ba tana da passport nata. Idan muka cigaba da wannan alaƙar ni ne zan cutar da kaina kuma ni ne wataƙila zan fi zama desperate na son kasancewa tare da ita ganin yadda take da kuma yadda take rayuwa cikin simplicity. Itace wannan matar da mutum yake samun natsuwa da kwanciyar hankali a wurin ta. Me namiji yake buƙata a wurin mace, bayan waɗannan? 

“You choose for us” na bata zaɓi

   “I don't want us to hurt each other at the end, Baffa. Whatever you choose, I'll be pleased with it”

      “Shiyasa nake baki zaren Temi. I'm giving you the thread and you do with it as you wish. I won't be angry. I promise”

Hannuwan ta tasa a kafaɗa ta ta riƙe ni sosai “What we have will hurt us, Baffa. I know it will. I'll leave Nigeria. Even if I didn't leave Nigeria, our relationship will be a long distance one. I'm happy at the chance you gave this. But if you think we can do it, then I'll be happy you're giving this more than a week”

Kallon ta nake tunda ta fara magana har tayi shiru. Nasan ba zan iya cigaba da wannan alaƙar ba. Ba zan taɓa iya yarda da nayi wannan abun ba ba tare da iya faɗin inda ze kaimu ba. Ba zan so zuciya ta ta karye ta yanda bana tsammani ba. Murmushi nayi na shafa kafaɗar ta “We should stay the way we were before we started all this”

   “Not best of friends?”

Girgiza kai nayi. “Not best of friends. We're better off like that”

Shiru tayi bata ƙara cewa wani abu ba. Nima ban sake cewa wani abu ba. A cikin raina ina sanin da wuya na samu wata mace wacce zata ƙauna ce ni kamar yadda Temi ke ƙaunata. 

Daga yanzun anyi etching Temi a cikin zuciyata. Zan tuna ta a matsayin mace lively and loveable. Mace me cike da simplicity me farin ciki a kodayaushe. 

Tashi tayi daga gefe na ta samu wuri chan nesa dani ta zauna ta min kallo sau ɗaya wanda ya nuna disappointment nata. Taya zan zauna da macen da a kodayaushe da nake tare da ita ina tunanin the most unthinkable?